Bent old geezer in his 'very gay' flat
I am 'Bent' and I do not approve of 'gay marriage'
by Rob DeFrees
May 16, 2008
May 16, 2008
Mr. Benjamin and Mr. Orozo,
I am not writing to bang on about how horrid I thought your story was. To be true
it was a fair reporting of the facts as you know them. I would like to add to
your knowledge.
Thw whole world knows that I am bent(gay) due in no small measure to the
report done by Fresno Bee in December. The whole wolrd knows that I had a
long time companion. He is dead these past 21 years.
Note that I say 'companion' and also have been know to refer to John as my
'best mate', 'soul mate'. I have never referred to John as my 'husband' or 'wife'
we were together for almost 20 years. I loved him and he loved MOI.
Not once in all of that time did I feel that our relationship was not honoured by
the folks who knew us, and we are talking about folks from all walks of life. As
one person told MOI at the service held for John; 'we all knew how very much the two
of you loved one another, and that is what is important'.
Along with being bent, I am also Catholic.
I have never felt that two men or two woman qualify for the sacred rite of
marriage. Whatever is said, it is a union between a man and a woman. It is
to protect the family unit which includes the children of that union.
The 'lavender elite' will always bang on about how their rights must be protected
and that all must be treated the same. Rubbish. This is a political ploy to gain
something they feel lacking in their lives. A piece of paper has become
so important to 'gays' when countless folks live together and love each other and do not feel
the need to fight for the 'marriage'.
A famous chat show host had a partner. Elton John has a partner(mind he had to throw a party to
make statement of) Who bloody cares who sleeps with whom. Who loves whom.
You gave a lot of space to what some homosexuals want. They are not the whole of
the society. Nor are folks who are afriad of anyone different.
This story is huge. It will have a life that goes on and on. I hope that in the
days to come, you will seek out persons who are homosexual that vote, pray and pay taxes
that do not see this as a 'devine right'. That in the end, it is just a waste of
'public purse' to allow the 'lavender elite' to fight and fight and fight for something
that is not so important.
Ta, for hearing MOI out.
RobDeFrees
119 N Calaveras Street #e
Fresno, ca
I wrote this to the wtwo chaps who wrote the story in the Fresno Bee this morning. I do not know if the chaps are members of 'the love that dare not speak its name' nor do I care.
John and I were together for almost 20 years. Longer than most homosexual unions last. We were not married. We were not known as 'husband and wife'.
John has been dead these past 21 years. When he got ill with AIDS, our friends and neighbors did not shun or run away from. They respected that a tragic thing had come and one of us was going to die. John was my long time companion, the whole world knew that. They respected us and honoured us with their love and shared grief when John died.
I am homosexual, catholic, republican, american, british, cheeky, old,activist,neighbor, californian. Pick which order to place. I never wanted more than I was entitled to. I believe that John and I had a life as two sharing love, that most saw as real even if they thought it odd and different.
The 'lavender elite' is very powerful and will fight for this right come what may. If there is a measure placed on the ballot to change the ruling or word the constitution of claifornia differently, they will beg for cash and force the 'public purse' to be picked clean to bang on about this. Let it rest. In the end who cares if two men or two women want to set up house. Just honour the special rite that marriage is. It is between a man and a woman.
»
Actually am right fond of self
Rob DeFrees
Having been in a relationship that lasted until the death of my companion, MOI knows full well that one gives up some things in life when one makes a choice to be 'openly'
homosexual. Sadly, America is not UK and the strong feeling about people of the same sex getting totaly legal status will never come to pass.
What was learned by MOI in a time when faced with tragic events(the death of partner due to AIDS) is that the community you live in, are a part of, is what matters most. If you have live well, be surprised at how many folks will honour you.
(groush)
Re: 'Bent,'
Yes, 'Bent' is an older term for 'gay,' (as in 'Bent' vs. 'Straight.'
The play that you saw,
(which I actually did a reading in back in college..... yeeesh, maybe almost twenty five years ago?) Is one that really needs to seen more.
-As a straight guy reading one of the lead roles, (the other guy who was reading the other lead was bi.)
---It was a very moving piece (About gay men in an Nazi prison camp, the one closeted, the other quite open, ---if I recall.)
(spoiler alert)
--The ending, (where the one walks into the electric fence with the dead body of the other in his arms (accomplished by having massive massive floodlighting blazing directly into the audience from upstage (essentially they're blinded, and the actors disappear into it,) STILL is one of the most powerful visuals I've ever seen...
It also (in terms of 'legend,') gave rise to the old fable that 'Richard Gere was gay.'
---I believe he was one of the first actors to have a significant role in the play, and it go to noteriety,
---so folks just assumed that he was 'Bent,' as well.
Anyway, it's a devestating astonishing work, (not for everybody, and a bit of a challange for an actor/reader to perform, --as it's so personal.)
--It's not at all a new work, but I think the message still would be relevant today.
Big Fuss
On internet everyone is doing such a big fuss out of gay relations! I really don’t get the point why some of the people around are against homosexuals! I think they simply don’t have other subjects to argue about because gay relations do not affect anyone! The main reason against gay marriage that they use is that homosexuality is not natural but how about eyeglasses, polyester, and birth control? These are not natural neither.
Bent
By the way, is "Bent" slang for "homosexual"? I saw a play, then a movie named Bent - I always wondered about the title.
Thanks.
Gay Marriage
My first inclination is to ask Rob, “Hate yourself much?”, but I think that’s too easy and simplistic. You come from a different time, you come from a strong religious background – evidently. So, if marriage isn’t right for you, so be it. My husband and I have been together for 20 years. Yes, that’s right, I said husband…and, sin of sins, I’m a man. We do not belong to any elite, hell we don’t even belong to any clubs. We’re two guys, in our 40s who just want the same rights as everyone else. Nothing special, nothing extra. We pay our taxes, commit no crimes, raised someone else’s kid, and we hurt no one. I’ll even give you this, I believe that if a church does not want to perform gay marriage, fine….. don’t. Church marriages are just that, religious sacraments. If someone’s belief system prohibits certain activities, like Jews prohibiting pork, then fine. But just for them. They should not dictate what is right for others.
Benjamoon von Schwulemann
And I thought I spoke oddly
Rob DeFrees
Your use of the word gives MOI a right good giggle. In the UK, if one manages cash badly, they might find selves on 'queer street'. I do not have a problem with the word. Almost as good as 'bent'.
I am sorry to read that you did not have protection when you needed it most. There are many fine organizations that will help folks do legal documents that protect the rights of folks. I need not cost buckets of cash.
Religion is a private thing and what you believe or not believe does not change what society has in place to protect the 'traditional family unit'. We do live in a world that sets the rules by the demands of the many rather than the few. There are exceptions and that is the hallmark of any great society. I just do not see this as one of the fights that need to be fought.
If I had a quid for every person who did not have anything that was a rabid activist I would indeed be quite wealthy. Am right surprised at how folks can find the means to fight for things if they want to make a political statement. I saw it first hand when there was a massive fight to secure monies for AIDS.
I do not deny anyone the right to do whatever. I question the motive.
I'm sure queen Dan will come out on the attack Rod
He will have a hissy fit and get so worked up he will write a "Queer Eye" newspaper article attacking you. The gurl will be so upset he can't drink his diet 7 up. He will blame you when he loses his gurlish figure. You will suffer the rath of the Lavendar Elite of Fresno. They might summon you before the "Court" of tarted up pompus old wind bags.
Then forever pretend you do not exist anymore.
Off with the head of anyone that dare say your name in their presence. That is if they are not too busy chasing chicken in Woodward or Kearney Park.
Why deny others what you do not want?
Benjamoon von Schwulemann
I am a queer, athiest cornball who was with my late partner for over 25 years. To us the whole concept of marriage (heterosexual, homosexual, polymorphous polygamous, what have you)seemed absurd and worn out as an "institution". It was fine if one was so inclined, but we thought, "why bother?". When California adopted the "domestic partnership" thing we registered because we thought it would provide the same CIVIL protections that came with CIVIL marriage. By that time we'd seen so many instances of people cut off from their loved one when he or she became ill. We thought this partnership registration would protect us. Ofcourse, that document turned out to be of little value.
I think I can safely say that most of the same sex couples who want to marry do not belong to any sort of lavendar, pink, fuscia, turquoise,chartreuse or even puce elite. In fact they don't belong to any elite. They do not have the money, time, connections or expertise required to protect themselves from losing property, hospital visiting rights, etc. should something happen to the other partner.
I am sure that should homosexual marriage become legal that many homosexual persons will still choose NOT to marry. Many heterosexual persons choose not to do so. Many married men and women produce no children. Should their marriages be annulled?
Hank?
Rod Please tell us what you reallly think. Don't hold back.
LOL
I guess we won't tell you about the one running for Mayor with the "fake" wife. You might paint his parking stall lavendar. But as you fight the "elite" to get your street cleaned up I'm sure you know "who" they are at "City Hell". Wonder if they have lavendar caskets?
(Places fingertips on lips like Mrs Obama discussing how they love Oprah and Gail with Larry King. Looks at camera and innocently asks, "Am I allowed say that?")
Keep giving them heck Rod.
Besides posting the picture of your favorite dwarf you should post pictures of the drug houses on line. "Out" them too. If word gets out the drug house pictures are on line it might scare them away.
How about making a map of Calaveras with all the drug houses labled and posted around where everyone can see it?
Make it too hot for them.
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